are you still at the devil's house?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
i've created a new STD.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
