She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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