16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
