check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
