I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
