Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
