BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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