When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
