Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
