Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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