She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
