I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
