I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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