this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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