LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
