Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
