I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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