I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
