you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
