ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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