So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize