Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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