READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
