i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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