sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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