Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
