I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
