I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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