Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
