Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
