real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
