We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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