Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize
