I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
