i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
