We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Life is so much better after having sex.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize
