would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
