i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize