you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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