Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She swung at the pinata with crutches
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
