How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Randomize
