I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
