erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
