i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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