too bad you live with your parents still
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize