But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
