Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize
