Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
