Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
