they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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