This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Boobs speak an international language.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
