i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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