she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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